Showing posts with label Instant Messages. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Instant Messages. Show all posts

Instant Message Confessions

Wednesday, September 5, 2007

This kept me going for a whole hour.

Me: I need to marry some rich woman or have a sugar mama to pay off my student loans for me. I am highly considering an older woman. Believe it or not!
M: less drama. I wont spend money on going out...decent sex...housing...pretty sweet deal
Brooklyn: I have actually considered a sugar momma but I don’t think I would be happy I need to be the breadwinner...no way really tell me about her
M: I haven’t met her yet. Are you kidding? U r such a homo...the bread winner
B: ooo damn i got excited 4 u lol.... shut up and yes, yes i am...
M: so u better find urself a little lezzie who likes that
B: lol I’m sure some woman out there would love to be a trophy wife
M: haha. I want to be a trophy wife. That’s my goal. actually…become a writer and a trophy wife with three kids and they all play tennis or soccer.
M: and a dog name Sophie
M: and a cat - Cinderella
M: yeah. I got it all planned out
B: lol ok well there has to be some1 else out there.... and 3 kids no way. Where r u living since u have everything else planned
M: a brownstone in the West Village. And a summerhouse in the Adirondacks
M: this is going to make my blog… just an FYI
B: lol that’s fine lol I like the brownstone idea but do u really want to raise ur kids in the city?
M: yes. Best private FRENCH schools
B: that’s cool then u and her better make a nice salary
M: well yeah. See that’s the problem. She needs to make lots of money...cause writing is not going to pay for my expensesB: lol so u need a lawyer/doctor/business woman.....some1 like that

There is more. but i am just too lazy to edit it.

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A Lonely Thursday

Thursday, July 5, 2007

This, my friends is what happens when you work in Publishing and it is a Thursday afternoon.

me: shoot me!
NYU: only if u shoot me at the same time
me: ha! I’ll try
NYU: arghhh
me: how are you keeping yourself busy?
NYU: im on college humor. I need coffee... again
me: hmmm...try to think of something else to keep u awake
NYU: like... sitting here with nothing to do?
me: yeah. That can help
NYU: oh it’s working already!
me: i bet. Don’t you worry. U only have 2 hrs to go
NYU: an hour and 50 minutes haha
me: actually an hour and 53 min. according to my pc
NYU: its wrong!
me: really? Shit. My phone says the same thing. ur pc is wrong
me: you are just trying to get out 3 minutes earlier
me: shame on you

5 minutes later:

me: how do you feel about the name "Lucy". I know its random.
me: hmm I wouldn’t even know how to begin answering that
NYU: it reminds me of I love lucy
me: lol
NYU: Why?
me: yeh. This lady from edit just came to say hi to me. She just had a baby. And so I said, "oh, what's her name" she responds with a "its Lucy. Isn’t it cute?"
me: so I lied. I said "yes, its beautiful"
me: but truthfully, i think it may be the worst name in the baby book
NYU: ya I don’t like that name. I thought u were gonna say it was your moms name or something
me: nah.
me: couldn’t she have thought of something cuter? I wonder what tiff is going to name her kid.
NYU: apparently not. Haha hmmm lets ask her
me: u do that. She already thinks I’m like this pregnant women hater
NYU: haha
NYU: nathaniel shea or haley joy
me: shea like shea stadium?? Hardcore Mets fan.
NYU: totally.

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Instant Messages

Monday, May 14, 2007

Monday is Monday I.M. Madness. I made that one up. My mind stays alert on two important things – emails and I.Ms



Morning Instant Messages:

Me: Omg!!!! One of my boss’ clients totally just did the sex eye to me. I kid you not.
L.A. Dude: duh! You know you are a hot lezzie!
Me: She wasn’t cute though. Bag over her head type of sex
L.A. Dude: You are my idol.
Me: She’s not THAT pretty. Come over and see.
L.A. Dude: I’ll grab some coffee for the entertainment.

Afternoon Instant Messages:

Brooklyn: u suck then u are not the all mighty lesbian god after all
Me: only in the bedroom


The In Between Instant Messages:

The Writer: Congrats on the Transgender article.
Me: mais, merde!!!
The Writer: huh?
Me: what?
The Writer: May I remind you that we are in America and not La FRANCE!
Me: ooOps, wrong IM darling.
The Writer: Thought so. So yeah, great job. I like how they gave you minimal credit for it.
Me: totally screwed me over but its ok I had a blast interviewing some of them. Did I tell you that one of the M to F is absolutely stunning? I could have sworn she had a real vag.
The Writer: FYI – The Museum of Sex Gala thing…what are you going to wear?
Me: uh…nothing really. A little lingerie thing from vickies. I am going to sell myself. Writing doesn’t cut it.
The Writer: you whore.
Me: only at events where the admission is a $1000+. At least I don’t go to Cattyshack and expect little Brooklyn girls to buy me drinks because I’m “famous” in the lesbian world.
The Writer: you whore.

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