Open Letter to the Gym Lady
Tuesday, August 21, 2007
To the Unsuspecting Woman of the W. 53rd St New York Sports Club,
Do you realize the terror I must have experienced around 600 this morning, August 21st, 2007.I hope for you that that your intention was NOT to parade through the women's locker room, wearing nothing but your birthday suit.
I have to admit, It seemed that you were too preoccupied with checking your voicemail and obsessing about something or other in your highly pms state, to comprehend that you had left your towel in the locker. I hope It was a purely innocent move on your part, as you gallivanted to the shower, all saggy tits and pubes. You should be fully aware of the trauma you may have caused some of us, having no choice but to stare unabashedly at your slightly unmanicured bush.
It's times like these, dear woman, that you should appreciate the need for regular waxings.
I noticed that your faux pas was unnoticed until you reached the shower, looked down and said "fuck". You did try to redeem yourself by grabbing a towel on your way back to the locker, in order to not subject ME to double the pleasure of your nubile self.
Woman of 53rd street, I hope you are on your way to get a Brazilian, some lipo, and a tit lift.
Sincerely,
NYC.Lezie.
Do you realize the terror I must have experienced around 600 this morning, August 21st, 2007.I hope for you that that your intention was NOT to parade through the women's locker room, wearing nothing but your birthday suit.
I have to admit, It seemed that you were too preoccupied with checking your voicemail and obsessing about something or other in your highly pms state, to comprehend that you had left your towel in the locker. I hope It was a purely innocent move on your part, as you gallivanted to the shower, all saggy tits and pubes. You should be fully aware of the trauma you may have caused some of us, having no choice but to stare unabashedly at your slightly unmanicured bush.
It's times like these, dear woman, that you should appreciate the need for regular waxings.
I noticed that your faux pas was unnoticed until you reached the shower, looked down and said "fuck". You did try to redeem yourself by grabbing a towel on your way back to the locker, in order to not subject ME to double the pleasure of your nubile self.
Woman of 53rd street, I hope you are on your way to get a Brazilian, some lipo, and a tit lift.
Sincerely,
NYC.Lezie.
meanie!!
you would have been mortified. I just sorta looked at her up and down and sucked my teeth like those caribbean ladies.